Follow your…passion?

It gets repeated a lot, but what does it mean to “follow your passion”?

Bottom line: Put very simply, following your passion means you have found a way of serving others wherein you also find personal joy. It doesn’t mean you’re out making millions of dollars. It doesn’t mean you’re always happy or that you don’t suffer. It simply means that you enjoy what you do for other people. 

My passion has always been helping people to become better at what they do, dream bigger than what they think is acceptable (after all, they are dreams!), and to achieve their goals. However, that wasn’t always apparent to me in the way I phrased it above.

For a very long time, I wandered through life seeking my fortunes, but never really understanding how to achieve it. I always thought the people who were selling the dream of wealth were charlatans, like Don Lapre, “buy my fool-proof system for $99 and you too can be a millionaire in just 3 easy steps.” As it turned out, those 3 easy steps were actually more like 99 ridiculously complicated instructions that seemed to twist back around on themselves. 

For me, the problem was less about telling me precisely what needed to be done, and more about helping me to develop a system where I could come up with the instructions on my own. Without even realizing it, I sought out coaches and mentors to help me understand the path I needed to take, but the people I selected were often not well-suited to helping me. They either wanted to micro-manage everything I was doing, or they were completely confused by my inability to understand their “very simple instructions.” 

So, I gave up. I became cynical and scoffed at the blossoming world of self-development, mentorship and coaching. I thought all those people were just suckers who had too much money and didn’t know what to do with it. I was unable to find a mentor to help me do what I wanted to do, and that made me feel justified in saying mentorship and coaching didn’t work.

Just one tiny problem...I didn’t actually know what it was I wanted to do myself. Whenever a prospective mentor would ask me what my goals were, they typically amounted to something like “I want to make more money” or “I want to be rich.” They were always about me and never about who I wanted to serve. I didn’t even understand what it meant to serve others. To me, it was just a thing people said when they wanted to sound humble.

Then I had a breakthrough. Various different religious speakers have talked about this phenomenon where, if you are not humble, you will be humbled. Well, I was humbled. Through a series of poor choices on my part, and having to deal with the consequences, I found myself in a situation where my only choices amounted to asking others for help. It wasn’t something I was used to, and I didn’t want to do it. However, I swallowed my pride over and over as I went, with hat in hand, as they used to say, to seek a helping hand. 

What I learned was that it was not shameful to ask for help. In fact, it’s one of the fundamental ways in which we humans connect with each other. I learned that helping others is one of the greatest gifts we can offer, and that by refusing to seek help, I had been denying others the joy of being able to help me. It sounds funny to say it that way, but it’s absolutely true. 

And that’s how I found my way to this calling. I found that others were not only willing to help me, but that they were happy to do so, and they frequently would check on me even after they had rendered their service. It made them feel good. I wanted to feel that way. So, I started by trying to help whoever I could in any situation that I thought I could be useful. 

I worked with the missionaries at my church to visit the sick, the elderly and many lost people who were struggling with their own demons, and we helped them find peace and comfort in Christ. I spent time with the people at my job to understand their needs and I focused on trying to serve them. Perhaps most importantly, I talked about all of this with my best friend, the woman I married and am honored and humbled to call my wife, and not only did my understanding of service improve, we found many ways to grow more closely together and become even better partners in the service of our family. 

Challenge: I love the way I am able to serve others. How about you? I would challenge you to identify an area of your life (family, career, faith, etc.)  where you recognize that there is an opportunity for improvement. Find a person in that area, and figure out what you can do to serve them, and do it with no expectation of gratitude or acknowledgement on their part. Do not focus on their attitude toward your service, as they may have many reasons for not displaying gratitude (although, I have found that even the most abrasive people can generally manage a “thank you” if you’re sincere in your efforts to be of service). Rather, focus on how it makes you feel to know that you have been able to help someone else.

As always, I am ready to serve you. If you’re interested in an accountability partner and a guide on your journey, then reach out to me and let’s get started on your adventure.

Be strong and of good courage, and good things will come your way.